Hey Heart Attack Grill -- Kind of Not Funny Anymore!
Well the
second unofficial spokesman for the Heart Attack Grill in downtown Las Vegas has
died-- from an apparent heart attack. Fifty-two-year-old John Alleman suffered a
heart attack as he waited at the bus stop in front of the restaurant! Alleman
was taken off life support shortly after 1 p.m. on Monday according to
restaurant owner Jon Basso who also said, "He lived a very full life. He will be
missed." Alleman did have a genetic predisposition for cardiac problems, as both
of his parents died of heart attacks in their 50s. The Heart Attack Grill is
famous for its high-calorie menu that includes a record-breaking 9,982-calorie,
3-pound Quadruple Bypass Burger. In March 2011, Blair River -- known as the
Grill's "Gentle Giant" -- died of flu-related pneumonia, Basso said at the time.
The 575-pound spokesman was just 29. Since then, the Heart Attack Grill had a
run of health-related incidents that seem to live up to the restaurant's fated
name. In February 2012, one man was stricken with what was believed to be a
heart problem while eating a Triple Bypass Burger. Two months later, a woman
suffered from a similar medical problem while reportedly eating a Double Bypass
Burger. It was not known at the time if her medical issue was related to the
food. (Las Vegas Sun)

Valentine's Day Sewage Tour Back By Popular Demand!
It'll be
another very interesting Valentine's Day for a select group of New Yorkers. Back
by popular demand, the Department of Environmental Protection is once again
offering Valentine's Day tours of the Newtown Creek sewage treatment plant in
Brooklyn's Greenpoint section. The DEP is offering three tours this year due to
"overwhelming demand." The 9:30 a.m. and 1 p.m. tours were quickly filled so
another was added at 11 a.m. Highlights include the plant's giant egg-shaped
digesters, which break down noxious waste into harmless sludge and gas. During
last year's tour, the plant's gung-ho superintendent warned the visitors a
digester egg was about to emit a fairly foul odor. It did not disappoint.

World's Nicest McDonald's!
So you love the Mickey D's? Well you'll
have to travel quite a ways if you're intent on eating at the world's finest. A
McDonald's franchise in Australia is offering full table service for its dine-in
customers, complete with china plates, glassware and metal cutlery in place of
the more traditional paper boxes and plastic. Meals are brought to the table by
waiters and waitresses and diners can daintily dab their lips with actual cloth
napkins after eating. Manager Michelle Steain said, "It's very popular. Everyone
seems to be loving it." (Hmmmm. Wonder who thought up that line?) Glenn
and Katia Dwarte are the owners of the franchise located in Warilla, some 60
miles or so south of Sydney. They sought permission for the idea after their
habit of serving Mr. Dwarte's parents with cutlery and plates caught the
attention of other diners. (Reuters)

Owls: You Can't Kill Them!
As Sonji Coney Williams was driving at
60 miles-per-hour down Florida's Turnpike, she suddenly saw a great horned owl
coming right toward so fast it was impossible for her to avoid hitting the bird.
She said she felt just horrible but it was night, very dark and she didn't feel
safe pulling over. Of course she assumed the owl was instantly killed until the
next day when somebody spotted it PEEKING OUT FROM BEHIND HER RADIATOR GRILL!
She called Florida Fish and Wildlife and an officer opened the hood and freed
the bird. Miraculously the owl was in great shape and didn't appear to have
suffered any injuries! (Ananova)

Got a Long Drive? We Suggest Fiat!
Got a long drive ahead of you?
We suggest a Fiat! Philip Young and Paul Brace just set a new world record after
driving 10,300 miles from Cape Town, South Africa to London in just over ten
days! Their vehicle of choice for the journey -- a Fiat Panda! The new record of
10 days, 13 hours and 30 minutes was made when they crossed the finish line at
London's Marble Arch. The previous record was 14 days, 19 hours and 26 minutes.
Even more remarkable, the British duo had to pass through some the world's most
inhospitable places to make the journey -- including Libya even though its
borders are officially closed to foreigners. Their trip started in South Africa
and they travelled through Botswana, Zambia, Tanzania, Kenya, Ethiopia, Sudan,
Egypt, Libya and Tunisia. They have also raised almost $20,000 for the British
charity Farm Africa, which was set up to tackle hunger in east Africa.

TV Stations Sends Out Fake Zombie Apocalypse Alert!
A few thousand
people in Great Falls, Montana got quite a jolt after the emergency alert system
of KRTV-TV sent out a Zombie Apocalypse warning during the middle of the Steve
Wilkos Show! Apparently the system was hacked and several counties received word
that "dead bodies are rising from their graves!" The warning also told those
watching not to try and apprehend the dangerous zombies-- only to get to shelter
and stay safe! Afterward KRTV-TV felt obliged to let viewers know both on the
air and online that the alert was bogus stating, "This message did not originate
from KRTV, and there is no emergency." So far, no one has been able to figure
out who did the hacking or if it was some kind of viral marketing for the AMC
series, "The Walking Dead." Dude -- it's that easy to hack an emergency alert
system. Yeah, that's scarier than even a Zombie Apocalypse! (Gawker)

And the New World Hula Hoop Record Goes To...
And the new world
Hula Hoop record goes to... Thailand! Yup-- nearly 5,000 Thai contestants are
celebrating after setting a world record for the most people dancing with hula
hoops simultaneously in one place. Guinness World Records adjudicator Seyda
Subasi-Gemici said that 4,483 people had swung hula hoops to dance music for
seven minutes without interruption. The event was held at an an open air stadium
at Thammasat University. Originally there were an even 5,000 participating but
517 contestants dropped out after they failed to keep their hula hoops up. The
previous world record was set in Taiwan in 2011, with 2,496 people.
(Huffington Post)

Rappin' For Jesus!
There's a new rap star on the scene. In the
style of legendary MC Grandmaster Flash, Pastor Jim Colerick and his wife
debuted some of their Christian-themed rhymes in a YouTube video called "Rappin'
for Jesus." Only issue is there seems to be some debate about whether this is a
parody of Christianity or a true homage to Christ. Questionable lyrics include,
"All the other MCs lived well, but if you live in sin, you burn in hell." And
then there's the most controversial line, ""Jesus Christ is my "N-word," he's
the son of the original G." But whether it's faux or fo' real, Pastor Colerick
may be the dopest clergyman of all time! (Huffington Post)