While it’s safe to say most brides and grooms really want guests to give them money as a wedding gift, is it ever okay to just come right out and ask for it? Well, a bride stirred up quite a firestorm on the Internet for asking just that.
The bride in question took to the mommy forum Mumsnet for opinions, starting off her query by writing that she doesn’t want to start a registry because they “don’t need enough stuff,” and that she’d be okay with “no gifts,” but she doesn’t want to end up with "random sh*te.”
She then added, “So what is an acceptable way to say 'we don't need gifts and will absolutely still love you and want you at our wedding if you don't bring one, but if you DO feel the need, please can it be money?'"
Well, many respondents were completely outraged by her request,
with one noting, "Just say no gifts please. Anything else is vulgar,” while another added, “There is no polite way of asking for money. Say no gifts and people will give money if they want to. We teach our children to be grateful for any gifts they receive and not to expect anything so I don't see why just getting married is somehow exempt from this rudeness."
But not everyone was quite as appalled,
with some saying it’s “perfectly fine” to ask for money. As one person pointed out, “I can't understand the no information thing, it's just polite to provide that information - why should guests have to chase down the bridal party to find out?" Meanwhile another gal said a lot of people ask for money these days, and in fact of the recent gatherings she’s gone to, only one didn’task for dough. She offered, "I don't think it's crass and as a guest it's easier to give money than a gift."