BREAKING NEWS ACROSS OUR IHEARTNATION:
The EAST COAST is about to be INVADED... by SPIDERS!
They fly. They're BIG AF. And they've been spawning in GEORGIA since last Summer... and now, the time has come for the SPIDER NATION TO RISE UP and make its way up 95 to SCREW WITH THE EAST COAST! The JORO spiders are BIG, colorful, they look similar to the radioactive spider which upon reason and belief bit the great PETER PARKER, giving him some super SPIDER powers.
This spider won't give you any powers.
WHAT WILL WE DO??!
Pray. Hide. And, buy RAID.
They are coming. We best prepare. That... is all.